Ministrymaker Magazine

Joe Beam, founder of Family Dynamics Institute, believes having a satisfying sex life is an essential part of strong marriages — and beyond certain biblical mandates, Christian couples should feel free to decide what is best for them sexually.

The outspoken pastor was recently interviewed on MSNBC. Statements like, “Why can women be multi-orgasmic and men not? Well, I’ve decided God just likes them better” would make many church folks blush, but Beam believes relationships will be strengthened as sexual walls are broken down.

In his seminar, Beam discusses everything from oral sex to sex toys. He invites participants to ask questions which he answers in graphic detail. Beam does have scriptural guidelines regarding sex that he says are a must for Christian couples. For example, he says there should be no pornography (drawings from the Kama Sutra are okay), no adultery, group sex, or anything that harms the body, just to name a few.

Apparently, folks who attend his workshops often come away from the event feeling free to discuss sexuality for the first time in their lives. A few women admitted they sometimes feel guilty while making love to their husbands, but after the workshop they claimed to have a healthier understanding of what the Bible actually says about sex.

Beam has been attacked by many Christians for his outspoken style and message. Some of what he preaches tends to contradict the teaching of other groups, such as Roman Catholicism. He responds to the criticism by saying if the Bible does not forbid it then you can do it.

While there are a few things Beam teaches that I disagree with, I am happy to see that Christians are at least taking the time to discover what God has to say about sex. There have been many man-made cultural and societal rules put upon the church over the years that have nothing to do with what the Word teaches. In my opinion, sex in the life of Christian couples is one of the most misunderstood issues in the church.

Obviously, when dealing with controversial issues such as sex, it’s important to read the Bible for yourself. Find out what God has to say about it and then follow your convictions. Each person should be fully persuaded regarding disputable matters. Christians often make things way more complicated than they need to be.

Having a satisfying sex life — whether Christian or not — will help strengthen not only your marriage, but also every aspect of your life.